sometimes a person's comment can really linger in my mind and affect me more than it should.
sometimes the inner battles within me can really drain me.
sometimes being with people too much can really drain me. although i get really recharged by one on one, deep & personal conversations.

to let go of the need to prove myself, to let go of the need to have to be accepted by everyone, to let go of all these sinful nature in me.

"Out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person."

there is too much wickedness in this world, and we have accepted them as part of our nature and our society - that we dont even recognise them anymore. that scares me. O Lord, purify my heart and make me clean, keep me in your righteousness.

Lord in praying for the matter about my future slightly more in recent days, it has revealed a lot of fears in my heart. the fear of failure, of people's judgement, of not being able to fulfil my own expectations. of not being able to make it or take the stress/toughness of it.of not coping. fears that I did not know existed.

i used to want a wedding with lots of people at a really nice hotel. but after attending a few weddings, i think perhaps a cosy one would do ^^

im so tired, but thank you lord for a weekend to look forward to this week - quietness with you, me and my favourite boy. i know you will bring me through this week (: