just read about how phelps is going for rehab. makes me wonder about human nature  - we strive to become better, to reach the top and when we reach the top - we dont know what to do with our lives. we dont know how to cope with the glory. no matter how good we are, we all have our own issues and troubles. reminds me of the convo i had with j about how everyone would have their own issues - the top student and the bottom student, the one who seemingly has it all and the one who doesnt.

so before we strive even harder, before we begin on an endless chase for something better, ask ourselves why. our motivations, our heart - search it deep and ask why. im not saying its wrong - but dont lose sight of what is most important.

this morning i had a conversation with a colleague about how i could have done more for one of my p. initially i was pretty affected as it seemed like i did something "wrong" but after a while, i was thankful that it was a good learning experience for me. after all its still my first year out and i was wondering about my plan for that p as well. i was also reflecting on the decisions i had made. so im glad that someone can provide some insight into the matter(:

that being said - there is always this inner battle at the back of my mind about this whole xx thing. I know it wont be settled anytime soon but I think its going to be one of the longest journeys ive ever taken, shouldnt think so much now and enjoy my 'youth' while i still can! as much as im excited for new phases of life - but im also reminded that its not going to be easy and there will be a lot of
more work & responsibilities.

alright tonight shall be an early night again! just one day of work and im all ready to just roll into bed.haha

goodnight world x